This is a weird one. When you are depressed you often start to sabotage your own chances of escaping from depression!
What do I mean by self-sabotage? Well, I thought it best to let research define that for us here, just so I don’t sound like I’m making stuff up.
I found a nice definition
“Self-sabotage occurs when we destroy ourselves physically, mentally, or emotionally or deliberately hinder our own success and wellbeing by undermining personal goals and values” (Brenner, 2019).
Essentially, you stop yourself from being, well – anything!
When you are depressed, often you know you are depressed, especially if you are going from a high to a low. But even though you know and in your head, you are telling yourself “I know what is happening”, you can’t change it. Not only can’t you change it, you actively sabotage your chances.
So for example, you are talking to friends and know full well you are talking like Eyore from Winnie the Pooh, but you just can’t “snap out of it”. Your inner voice is screaming at you to stop it – but you can’t.
Another example, you know you need to eat – but you don’t. It doesn’t matter how much you know you should, you just can’t be bothered. It seems pointless.
It is so frustrating and it becomes self-perpetuating because you get more and more unhappy because you know you are sabotaging yourself at every step!
If this sounds familiar – please, please, please seek help. There is help out there and there are people who want to help you feel better.
Here is a great resource for finding help in your area – https://checkpointorg.com/global/
Stay well.